I am 26y/o. In less than 4 years I will be 30y/o.
Maybe I am destined to do things differently. Or maybe I am just a freak. A coward.
Dear loved ones, thank you for the support. I'll strive and struggle better from now on. I will grab opportunities better.
It's just that right now, I am not strong enough.
No point in going forward in this direction. I got hurt so much I don't think I can take the pressure well. I guess I'm just too fragile in this sense.
Every time I fill my thoughts with this matter, my body started rejecting food. My mind got unstable, headache came and my focus got lost. I get traumatized.
I thought it's just a simple panic attack or I was restless and all but with the explanations stated, a girl called it anxiety issues. She used to have it.
My question is, would you stay if you feel unwanted?
In any kind of relationship or situation.
Last night a good friend asked, "What do you really wanna do in your life?".
I answered, "I just want to do things I want to do."
He's not satisfied with it. But I felt like telling everything already. I want to feel content. I want not just to be happy. I want to feel it. I want to live for it. Live with it.
Should I die young, I don't want to die regretting.