Setiap kali memasuki fasa kehidupan yang baru, ataupun mengakhiri suatu fasa yang menyenangkan, aku akan berada dalam keadaan yang teruk. 

Dalam tempoh seperti ini, kekuatan aku tiada. Lemah dan cuma tahu menjalani hari-hari dengan kekosongan. 

The real reason behind this is because I am afraid. I'm afraid to lose things I hold so dear. I'm afraid of the unknowns. I'm afraid to fail.

I was so scared to death this past few months. Finishing my study and not knowing where to go. Lots have been going on my mind and I cannot focus at all. 

Everybody else is fighting their own battles. And I should fight mine. But there were always buts everywhere.

And sometimes when we asked for perfection and hoping too much for the best to happen and it doesn't, it kills. It hurts. You waited and prayed longer but it stays that way.

I still want to reach for the stars. Bismillah.

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