Happy Birthday to Me :)

Officially 26 on 22nd.

Macam-macam dah tempuh. Why not for another 26 years at least if God wills me to live that long. Or longer. Or lesser. Whatever whenever it will be, I want to live awesomely.

Esok lusa boleh mati kan, we never know. 

I have been very troubled these past few months and fighting to cure myself to be at ease. Moga dengan apa kuat yang tinggal, dengan apa sisa yang berbaki masih lagi aku mampu untuk mula bertatih kembali. I'm tired of my numbness. I don't want to be a burden to anyone especilly Ayah, and Umi too actually. I wish they knew. I want to be able to help my siblings when they need me. I want to work hard, pray harder, be a good child, a great youngest one, a very dear friend to everybody I met and a faithful servant to Allah the Almighty.

I don't want people to pity me. I want to be the one who pitied people and be able to help them get through tough situations. I want to be more human than I am today everyday. I want to wake up everyday and don't need to search and think hard for reasons to stay alive. I want that reasons to build inside me well without actually forcing them.

I don't want to live normal. I want to be amazing. In order to be what I want, lets do the things I need to do first. I need a job to kill me. I need a job to build my dreams. I don't want to work but I need a job. Let's go find one. Because I need to stay alive and living well in order to get what I want.

Hello 26! Please be good to yourself.


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